I shared last week on my Insta story that I was trying to get my crap together and had made a daily schedule for me and the kids to follow each day. I got so many DMs about how organized I am and how people want me to share my schedule with them and I had to first, laugh hysterically and then immediately come on here and share the full story. (I’ll share my actual schedule too at the end – don’t worry!)
I am not a schedule person. Rhythms yes! Routines sure. But a rigid schedule makes me squirm, and honestly, I don’t trust myself enough not to break it and so I just save myself the trouble and forget the whole thing. I LOVE spontaneity. I love surprises. I don’t find out the genders of my babies. I just don’t NEED to plan. I don’t NEED control. I’m okay with a little mess. I’m just not a planner.
I used to think this meant that I wasn’t type A enough or that I just kind of sucked as a mom, but then I realized that it’s because I am such a type A perfectionist that if it’s not going to turn out perfectly then I’m just not even going to try. HATE to admit that one, but it’s probably true. Another reason I had kinda brushed off the whole schedule thing is that my husband and I both work from home and our days of the week just never look the same. Each one is always different and while I thought this meant I probably couldn’t make a schedule work, it actually means that I will drown without one (speaking from experience mamas!).
I want to find time to work and blog and do emails and I always wondered how all of those other mom + bloggers made it happen, and while I haven’t been at it for too long, I have a feeling that THIS is how. Prioritizing the things you love, being intentional with your time and kicking that mom guilt to the curb!
I’ve realized (after a long time of survival mode, flying by the seat of my pants and general chaos) that this whole “not a planner thing” just isn’t working out now that I have kids. It’s a known thing that children thrive off of routine and with a little encouragement and help from my (super planner) husband, we wrote out a daily schedule (the one on my story).
I’ll share it below but I want to mention a few things first.
- As I mentioned above, my husband works from home and works in our home all evening. So you will see pockets in the day where Zach spends time with the kids and helps me out a lot! This allows for me to get some rest/blogging/shower/cleaning time during my day but night time, I’m on my own. It’s kind of like our days are flipped from the usual work all day and then family time at night.
- I don’t do all of the things I write beside the time slot. Because I like a lot of flexibility, I decided to write a list of “suggestions” for myself of things to choose to do during that time. Sometimes I’ll do a bunch. Sometimes I’ll just do one. During quiet time, sometimes I just do the Netflix and ice cream one and I love every minute of it.
- This schedule might seem a little detailed BUT for a non-planner like me, the habit just isn’t there so we went really specific so that it was easy to stick to. Some days obviously go out the window and we do an all day play date or snuggle and watch movies if the kids are sick but it’s something that I can at least look to when I’m feeling like I have no idea what to do this day/week. If two of my weekdays turn out like this I’m MILES ahead of where I was.
- I have spent my entire motherhood journey thinking that unless I spent all day playing/being with my kids that I was a bad mom and wasn’t giving them the attention they deserved. I’ve never judged another mom for this or even really considered what other people did. I just thought they had a secret and were less tired than me and had lots of time. It’s literally JUST occurred to me that I need to enforce quiet time for Dex (who stopped napping at 2.5) and take some guilt free time for myself. To me, writing out work and “me time” things between 1 and 3pm made me feel so guilty. I felt that if anyone saw this schedule (like you guys right now) they would think I was selfish or not a great mom. This is my own flawed thinking and habit and has gotten me into a lot of trouble with stress and mom guilt. That being said, the purpose of this schedule is to make room! Room for things the kids love. Room for me to take care of the things that cause me stress. Room for me to pursue things I love outside of being a mom. The work/free time allows me to play and engage with my kids without feeling like I should be working and the play time allows me to work guilt free knowing that my kids had my undivided attention all morning, late afternoon and evening. My husband compared it to a budget (which we are pretty hardcore about), when you know and delegate exactly where your money is going, it feels like you got a raise! I’m hoping the same thing happens with my time.
- Lastly, I don’t think this should be your schedule. I don’t even necessarily think YOU need a schedule. If what you’re doing is working for you then don’t change a dang thing! This is just something born out of my personal struggles, my husband’s unique work circumstance, my children’s behaviour, and just needing a change. Take from it whatever you would like!
Guys, I’m still skeptical. I know I won’t be able to stick to this thing every day, but I’m offering myself grace and believing that whole progress not perfection thing that I’ve thrown around in the past and haven’t always lived out!
I’ll also include a PDF version here, in case you want to view or print of my schedule for your own use. Just click the link below.
I’d love to know if you have a daily schedule or if you just kinda wing it. What works for your family?
Thanks so much for reading!